Time for Love

When is the time to be Inlove?

(FAMILY)

I just don't know why other people are in the rush of finding for the love of their life. Well probably they would like to know who is the right one for them. It's

insane when I would saw a couple passed by or somewhere walking or actually dating, honestly I hate watching them. Am I that bitter to hate people seeing them happy

with the person they love? LOL!!! After seeing them I would actually told to myself well, every story does not end with a HAPPY ENDING. It's because I just experience

and witness the break up of my mom and dad who actually been together for almost 20 years and then in just one glimpse they just ended it. Seeing the situation I told

myself not to fall inlove like my dad did. Well, actually i really admire my dad. No one can explain how much he love my mom. Well, I think LOVE is not really enough

to keep the family more stronger and keep it longer. They both VOW to each other to be there for each other, for better or for worse, richer and for poorer and until

death .That will never happen anymore coz we've been dumped.Well it really sucks, when someone dumps you. I just don't know what to feel that time when my Mom decided

to end it and left us. Many things come to my mind, Honestly I planned to commit suicide; it's funny when the time i commit suicide I realize its really painful LOL..

so I decided not to continue and fight for it and stay stronger. I can't really explain how painful it was everytime I talk to my Dad about our situation coz everytime

we talk about it tears fall down to his eyes; it feels like my heart was squeezed so tight and I can't breath. That sucks.. First christmas to celebrate without my Mom

is really hard coz we've use to celebrate it together my mom, dad and my sister and before celebrating the christmas we will go to the church together. But that thing

now is just only a memory of the past that I can't ever experience again.I've been through so much pain/problems and challenges in life that I can't imagine I faced it

strongly. I'm used not to depend on my father on all things, except financial. Well im still a student though I can't support myself. My dad did everything to guide

and help me finished my studies. My mom was there for us but there comes a time my dad and my Aunt and Uncle decided not to allow us to see my mom or even text her.

One time when I went to the market with my Aunt to buy some stuff, I saw my mom. She was just watching me passing by and never talk to her or even watch her watching

us. That really sucks, seeing your mom and trying not to notice her even if I did.That's not only the first time I did that. The most worst is that when I passed by a

store and and saw my mom standing right there; when I passed by she called me many times and i never entertain nor look at her. I walk fast while she is calling my

name crying. But I never look back. Honestly it really hurts me so bad. Well after that time my friends told me to talk to my MOM and ask her and let her explain or

know her side. I did it. I texted my mom.She showed up and talk to me; explain all to me what really happens and what makes her decide to left us. You know what when

my mom was explaining tears never stopped falling from her eyes and always told me that she was really sorry for what happen. I blamed her and told her that she don't

love us anymore coz she's just thinking only for herself instead of thinking for us. Big word nailed to my mind SELFISH. That's what i felt. I really don't understand

the reason why....  Until the time came my Aunt call an Attorney for us to be settled and talk things in formal if what would be their decision. We went to the Law

Office with my sister and my dad after a minute my mom came. The attorney talk about things and let both sides explain and what they feel. After talking and advising

my mom and dad the attorney said we can't settle this you need both to decide if you would stay or end this thing. Both My dad said he would stop it. I know deep

inside my dad does not want to end it. I know how much he loves my mom. I just realize that time even if you really love a person time would come you would get tired

of it and realize things would change. Attorney asked my sister if who will she chose my mom or dad. My sister choses my dad. But when the attorney asked me about my

age, the attorney told me that I'm in a right age I know what to do. So I just watch and observe my mom and my dad and watch ourselves coz I know that would be the

last time we would be together as a family .. .  D*** its really hard and painful I just don't know what to do. My friends keep on telling me to stay strong and

believes on me that I can overcome it. My cousins and all my relatives were there for me guide and gives me motivational advices for me to stay strong not for my self

but also for my dad and my sister.. Until my college graduation came. My dad was so very happy and excited. Well that time, I actually give my mom a second chance.

We're okay. I already forgive her. She's my Mom . Instead of looking for the mistakes of my mom, I just always think for all the good things she made for me and be

thankful for the life, love and care she gave to me. My dad told me he will not attend my graduation if he will saw my mom. So i told my mom about it. I was really

upset and disappointed about it. I thought my mom was not there in my graduation day. She came and attend my graduation but sadly, she is just on the side just

watching us and making sure my dad can't see her. After the graduation and took pictures with my friends, relatives and my family my Mom went where I am to see me

wearing my "TOGA" and holding my diploma. When my dad saw my mom, he walks out. I know my dad did it for us to have time to take picture together with my mom. I cried

and cried. It really hurts , i feel so pity for my mom. We took pictures with my MOM. And told me congratulations I know i can make it and She said sorry again. And

wish that I can helo my dad and my sister and don't think for her coz as long as she stays alive she will be there always for me to support me to fulfill my dreams. No

words can explain how happy AI am that day even if my we didn't took a picture as a family even if for that day.  Well now Im 21 I just think for now that I would

never leave the person I love or my future family coz I know how painful it was to be a part of a BROKEN FAMILY.

Love or Responsibility

What would you choose love or responsibility?
If you loved someone and you came to the point that you would choose either your love or your responsibility that you must be done.. Think of it...  If your heart choose LOVE, your mind would probably kept on telling you that you must think first and don't let your heart win over your mind.. If the decision of your heart will give you your happiness, then go for it.. Follow your heart..
In practicality other people are making decision but they are thinking it first a million times before doing that decision.. Why? It is because they knew that if they would make the wrong decision, they would probably regret it for the rest of their lives..
Now I'm just thinking for the situation of the person who is close to my heart.. He is in the situation that his girlfriend really don't know what is his situation. He has a great responsibility to his family, as a breadwinner. Then come to think of it even he knows that he has a great responsibility to his family he managed his life. His family, education and his special someone. I don't really imagine how would he do that..I know that if you would come to the point that you would choose love or responsibility you would know and feel what my friend feels..



jen_thyrex31